Last week’s Newsletter…
Last week’s “Guest Editorial” generated a considerable amount of response, mostly positive. Many of you noted that there doesn’t seem to be any “program” that addresses all of the issues which underlay misusing alcohol.
For the most part you’re right. We have the AA cult, numerous personality cults, some science based approaches which disregard the personal, and so on. The problem is, as we have noted for years, none of these address the mosaic of problems most of you are self-medicating.
Let’s examine a common issue most of you are familiar with: unbalanced personal and/or professional relationships. The common solution to this is assertiveness training which is anathema to AA or any other cult and most programs generally.
“Question? Who are you to question? It’s your diseased thinking that got you here!”
This is, of course, nonsense, but when you’re beaten down it’s easy to succumb to the brainwashing and lose yourself in the process.
Anxiety is another common problem for which alcohol grants temporary relief but, as with all medicated problems, the relief is short-lived and problems only get worse. For that, the scientific CBT approach is useful IF you internalize the process.
Loneliness and boredom round out the top three problems we typically help you address and there is nothing like getting out and actually doing stuff – and “meetings” don’t count – to ease these problems.
Then, as the writer noted, there is the lack of a caring human in most approaches and, too often, a predator awaits in the guise of a “sponsor” or other designated guru.
So, what’s the solution?
WE created a unique niche a dozen years ago based on research into personal development, how people successfully change, how to correct unbalanced relationships, and how to ease loneliness in a caring, compassionate, and confidential setting that allowed us to bring both what we know and what you know to the table.
Yes, it was, and is, a radical innovation which will never make us rich, but will allow you to recover, regain your dignity, avoid labeling, and build whatever your version of a normal life is.
So why aren’t others following our lead? As noted, we aren’t getting rich, just making a decent living helping people we like, overcome a difficult problem. Additionally, in order to accomplish our goal of serving you, we needed to be educated, experienced, and invested in your success. All of those are the exact opposite of what “rehab” employs.
Two final points. As a team we demonstrate how people can work together equitably – something many clients have never seen modeled. Secondly: we assure you that there is neither magic nor rocket science involved. Your success will depend on you being as invested in your recovery as we are.
But we do stick with you, doing it with you, not to you or for you. Our “bedside manner” is pretty damn good, too, as the weeks of follow-up show.
Labor Day Weekend
So once again we find summer over, though not in S. California, with a last weekend as schools open and we look ahead to the next months of holidays, parties, DUIs, embarrassment, accidents, frowning friends, neighbors, relatives and children.
Most of this foolishness will start with Halloween and continue through Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year’s, the Super Bowl and Groundhog Day.
Remember last year when, many times, you said to yourself, “I not going to ruin another holiday season! I will fix this before next year rolls around!”
Next year is rolling around and if you want to fix it, primarily for yourself, but also for everyone you care about, it’s time to get in gear. Give yourself a head start and learn to cope with sober holidays, obnoxious relatives, vexing co-workers, dreary days, and Seasonal Affect Disorder.
Though it may come as a surprise, those who don’t drink, or drink appropriately, aren’t miserable. That fantasy about how miserable you’ll be without alcohol is just that – a fantasy to dissuade you from enjoying this time of year.
Just as there are those of you who can’t imagine enjoying sober sex, there are those who can’t imagine enjoying anything that doesn’t involve alcohol.
Why not trust us for 6 months and discover that events, friendships, and, yes, sex, are all better when you are “there,” engaged and aware.
And if you discover that you don’t like any of these unbuffered by alcohol then you can return to medicating with our blessing. But first, why not give it a try so you can make an informed decision. What have you got to lose but your current miseries?
Happier holidays could be just a phone call away.