Accusations, Professionals, and the Kafkaesque Labyrinth That Ensues.
In the 19th century, Booth Tarkington wrote, “Two things will be believed of any man whatsoever, and one is that he has taken to drink.” The only thing that has changed since then is that the “rule” now applies to women too.
It gets worse.
Hurling the accusation has evolved into a way to sabotage professional rivals, punish disliked colleagues and subordinates, and, personally, is used in child custody and other marital disputes.
As if this little shop of horrors weren’t enough, the 12 Step “rehab industry” has promoted all of these abuses as a way of increasing business, especially among deep pockets professionals, particularly physicians and other licensed or certificated individuals.
Here’s how this scam works. You are accused, justly or not, and you are suspended and referred for an assessment. Guess what? In the 12 Step world there are only two possible outcomes, either you “admit” to being an “alcoholic” or you are “in denial”. You are then mandated to 30, 60, or 90 days of “rehab” with no appeal, no second opinions, and no treatment options.
Notice how this “process” bears no resemblance to what would happen if you suffered from an actual disease?
It‘s even more bizarre if you decide on your own that your drinking may be getting out of hand and you report yourself to one of the “voluntary assistance boards” that have been created for physicians and attorneys in particular. Keep your eye on that word “voluntary.”
Once you have volunteered yourself, you are stuck in the same maze and nothing is voluntary anymore. It’s just like the military. Enlistment is voluntary, after that you’re trapped.
Few and far between.
We have successfully worked with a number of professionals over the years and we’ve seen the mistakes they have made before contacting us. Believe us, it’s a lot easier to manage things before the errors are made.
So, if you think you might have or be developing a problem, arrange for a confidential assessment on your own and fix any problem that is apparent. Remember, never ever ask a 12 Step program, but get a real assessment based on the DSM-5 criteria and other relevant information.
If you are being ordered to a specific facility for treatment or assessment, refuse and get an attorney. Do not volunteer. Stay in at least some control of your options. Most people make the mistake of rolling over in which case they are doomed and will be labeled, abused, and blackmailed for the rest of their careers.
The 12 Step con game has infiltrated every level of licensing boards, courts, “assistance” programs, Human Resources departments, and government agencies. Rehab programs pay excellent kickbacks to those who force professionals into becoming unwilling and inappropriate clients. There is nothing benign about the “business of recovery” and the treatment mills it has spawned.
Remember too, they can buy a lot of leverage for $35 Billion dollars a year including, as just one example, making massive contributions to public radio in return for controlling program content regarding “treatment.”
So, if you have a problem, fix it now – quietly, privately, and effectively. If you are being unjustly accused, preempt the accusers by getting a valid assessment now. If you’re caught in the web, get an attorney now.
An article in the Sunday New York Times, May 1st edition, noted that aging results in a decline in many areas in our lives. That’s not news to us – we’re both past 60 – nor to most of you since readers and clients tend to be 40 something to 70 something.
The article went through a depressingly long list of declining abilities and activities, and, yes, generally speaking, the writer is correct.
Except the writer neglected to consider all of the benefits that aging also confers.
- decisions about having and raising children are largely in the past;
- career decisions are mostly made;
- many things we don’t want to do, we can avoid by saying, “sorry, I’m too old to….”;
- we don’t much care what other people think.
And we can follow the rules I learned from the aging rescue dogs who have saved me over the years:
- dine with gusto;
- nap often;
- accept affection;
- turn a deaf ear;
- take a walk;
- make new friends.
Finally, the writer did stress the importance of engaging in something!
He’s right, of course, which brings us back to you and why you find yourself abusing alcohol.
As we become less active, as our bodies refuse to do some of the things we once enjoyed, as aches and pains – physical, emotional and psychological – intrude, it’s easy to drink away the discomforts until we find ourselves, as one client put it, simply “putting in time waiting to die.”
That’s not a good alternative to living.
Now more than ever, most of you have the time and resources to engage in living as never before. Yes, ENGAGE! Learn something, teach something, rescue someone or something. Take the risks you’ve always been afraid to take.
Life is about “doing stuff”. Can’t do the same old, same old? Good! Participate anew. You weren’t meant to be a spectator. Don’t let alcohol turn you into one while there are still things to be learned, done, and taught.
Shogun, Jazz, Sophie, Parker, and Scruffy, our collection of rescue dogs, have taught us well. Let us help you discover how to follow their examples.
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