Having reviewed Monday and Tuesday’s program agendas for your consideration, we now move along to Wednesday.
By this time we will, together, have begun to rough out a picture of what you are medicating, what is habit, what is self-image, and what some of the contributing factors – and people – are. This is always a mosaic of bigger pieces and smaller, and distinctly individual.
Which brings up another of the dozens of entrapping AA myths, the one-size-fits-all “I’m a powerless, diseased, alcohol/drug/food/porn/web addict.”
Really? That’s how you want to refer to yourself, and think of yourself? And this is going to save you from?
Certainly not the legion of 13th Steppers and rehab mill operators, no matter how smooth their patter, glossy their ads, and luxurious their estates. Not that they won’t welcome you back again and again and yet again. At least until the money runs out.
Happily,you are not among the ensnared.
Instead, you are actually creating an idiosyncratic model of what your new “normal” life is going to look like, as well as how you’re going to get there. Doing that means looking at topics specific to you. These include what motivates you.
No, not what’s supposed to motivate you, but what actually does. There will always be difficult days, events, people, and circumstances which require extra effort. That’s when you need to rely on what actually motivates you whether it’s health or vanity, wealth or sex, fame or obscurity, or your spouse and children/grandchildren.
Again, we don’t place value judgments on motivations – only on you needing to know what they actually are.
Nor do we waste more time talking about the benefits of stopping or the costs of continuing your current habits. Everyone knows those and the typical “group discussion,” like AA meetings, is just another exercise in time wasting “filler.”
We are, however, interested in the benefits you get from drinking since these are what you’re going to need to replace. We’re also interested in the benefits those around you get since that’s where the sabotage you’ll need to fend off arises.
And so goes Wednesday as we develop a clearer and more comprehensive picture of your relationship with alcohol. That picture is, obviously, the one from which we will develop a personalized resolution, one custom tailored to you, and your interests, abilities, and strengths.
Not the traditional “one size fits none.”
Tempted to Disappear Into the Cult?
Mary Ellen once wrote an article for women entitled “Great, He Quit Drinking, When Will He Recover?” It’s a good reminder and won’t hurt you men to read it either.
Yes – that when men and women alike join the AA cult they are never going to recover. That’s why it’s called being “in recovery” and why they can never leave the cult.
Unless they decide to actually recover in which case leaving AA behind becomes an even harder problem than giving up alcohol.
The Steps are just another price you, and those you care about, pay for you remaining missing in action. You will never fix whatever is wrong, only medicate with meetings rather than alcohol, never get a life, never have an emotionally intimate relationship, and never achieve any of the possibilities real adults are capable of and seek.
But if a childish quest to avoid self-responsibility is your goal, you will have found your home.
Ah, but that’s not you?
In that case, it’s time to give up magic, higher power door knobs, trinkets, silly slogans, and a ten-year-old’s mentality. Trade those in for expanding your personal power, your life, and your options.
Interested? Click on the link, read the article, review the last two Newsletters on Monday and Tuesday, and review today’s then call and see if getting a grip – and a life – holds more appeal than surrendering both.
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