Why Can’t It Be 6 Months From Now?
That’s the refrain we hear all the time, though sometimes it’s “two weeks” or “a month”, but the plea is always the same.
I want to have my alcohol problems behind me, but I don’t want to go through the process.
Kind of like Woody Allen’s admission the “I don’t mind dying – I just don’t want to be there when it happens.”
Really, though, it’s not all that awful. Certainly not as terrible as the consequences of doing nothing.
Yes, we know how it feels. Whether it’s quitting drinking, stopping smoking, losing weight, or some other major change, we’ve been there and done that.
We knew we were avoiding going through the first days, weeks, or months, and we did it anyway.
For example, 5 years ago Ed wanted to lose the 20 lbs he’d gained when he quit smoking 10 years ago. At Mary Ellen’s suggestion, and with some reluctance, he joined a local training gym.
Knowing himself, however, Ed didn’t just join the gym. He hired a trainer who’d been in the business for 50 years, and paid him in advance for thrice weekly sessions for 6 months.
The result? Because he’d invested in himself and excellent help, Ed listened and learned, lost the 25 lbs., and permanently changed his eating and exercise habits in ways he actually liked!
Ed still goes to the gym 3 times a week but no longer needs the trainer. Over the intervening years he’s lost another 15 lbs. and has his weight back to where it was when he was 35.
Now he also has a model for whatever changes he may decide to make in the years ahead – as well as a history of success:
- Over 20 years of leaving alcohol abuse behind;
- Over 10 years of leaving tobacco use behind;
- Over five years of leaving 35 lbs. of fat behind.
Isn’t that the sort of history you’d like to acquire?
So stop wishing it was a month into the change!
Make the commitment to yourself! Hire our help. Come now or next month you’ll be soooooo glad you did!
Help For Families…
This week we looked over the stats for articles we publish on EZines.com and, as usual, the most popular one was about how families can deal with adult children who are abusing alcohol. It seems there is a lot of that going around.
But the real problem here is that we all want to believe that we can make someone else change. Guess what? We can’t. As noted above, we have a tough enough time getting ourselves to change.
What can a person do?
While you can’t make someone else change, you can change how you interact with them. Don’t respond to their drinking with increased attention, for example, or with money when they run out, or with threats.
Mostly, focus on your own life and improving that and hope that this encourages them to begin to improve theirs as well. But even if they don’t, you’re still ahead, and you’re not supporting their self-destructive choices.
It also, of course, works the other way around. Stop abusing alcohol, create a better life, and family members may stop doing some of those things that drove you to drink in the first place.
If not, you’ll still be better off and enjoying a better life and you won’t be the scapegoat anymore. No small improvements.
It’s just one of the ways we do things that differ from what everyone else does – but the big difference is that our research and empowerment based methods actually work.
As another example, next week we’ll take up the question of our unusual approach for couples that has made it the most successful program in the country. Find out what we do that no one else has even thought of.
Until then, don’t hesitate to call!
Odds and Ends…
The Federation of State Physician Advocacy Groups (FSPAG) lists us as a preferred provider of effective and confidential services through our Licensed Professionals Program.
Whether you’re a doctor, lawyer, teacher, therapist, or other licensed of certificated professional, you can work with us without fear of exposure.
Ten Things I Wish I’d Known Before I Sent My Brother Off To Rehab is Mary Ellen’s popular article on what she learned the hard way ten years ago about the treatment industry.
Women and Alcohol – What To Consider In Treatment and why women need and deserve services built around women’s needs, not just another recycled (and failed) men’s program – which is all anyone else has to offer.
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Remember, whether you need to abstain or cut back, or discover what’s possible for you, we’re here to help.
For information, or just to talk, one of us answers the phone personally from 8:00 a.m. – 8:00 p.m., Pacific Time, unless we are with a client.
If we don’t answer, leave your name and number and one of us will usually be able to get back to you within an hour.