Who are the women who come to us from across the country? And why to they come here – not just from the U.S., but also from Canada and sometimes from around the world?

These women include physicians, college professors, artists, actresses, lawyers, politicians, business owners, flight crew, managers, teachers, executives, writers, housewives and yes, even a mortician.

Why? Frankly, they come because we offer the only program that views women’s alcohol abuse for what it is – a coping mechanism gone awry, not a disease they are powerless over. Women work with us because we offer research based solutions that are private, effective and affordable and which allow them to put alcohol abuse behind them. Permanently.

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Many Midlife Changes Contribute to Alcohol Abuse

For some women the onset of alcohol abuse coincides with the changes in hormone levels that signal the start of perimenopause – changes that we may be unaware of in the earliest stages. When this is combined with other stresses in our lives – job changes, health concerns, children leaving home – we can find ourselves abusing alcohol for the first time in our lives.

At this point, many of my women clients report that they start to get forgetful and experience “foggy thinking” and moodiness. These can be the first signs of menopause and, sometimes, the beginning of escalating alcohol consumption, as a means of easing various unfamiliar discomforts and a sense of unease.

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We are very grateful to our client for so kindly offering to keep a diary of her experience participating in our 5-day Women’s Outpatient Alcoholism Treatment program and also for allowing us to share her experiences with you. – Mary Ellen and Ed

The night before I was supposed to meet Mary Ellen and Ed, to start my alcoholism treatment program, I could not help but drink as much alcohol as I could ingest. I felt like I was being defiant and also completely in control, because I was deliberately getting drunk. It was my choice. However, I drank myself into yet another blackout.

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By Dr. Mary Ellen Barnes

“Powerlessness” Teaches You to Be A Victim

You’ve probably heard about “powerlessness.” It’s a founding principal of AA, the “First Step” of 12-Steps, and virtually every treatment regimen in the U.S. Believing it is also the biggest predictor of relapse and one reason newcomers to AA have a binge rate 4 – 7 times higher than before they ever walked through the door.

Being smart, you can figure out where this is going. Obviously, if I have a disease over which I am powerless, then I am not responsible for my behavior – past, present, or future. If one drink is all it takes then I have no reason to stop at one. If a “slip” wipes out my “sober” history then I might as well keep on drinking until I can’t manage another swallow. One drink or fifty, it’s all the same in the world of the disease model. And it’s not my fault – I’m a victim – what a relief that is.

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By Dr. Mary Ellen Barnes

You May Never Get Him Back

“I thought when he quit drinking…,” or “The program he went through says he’s successful, but…?” and “Is this all I have to look forward to?” The words vary but the underlying question is pretty much the same, “He was a drunk, now he’s a ‘recovering alcoholic.’ When’s he going to get over it?”

That’s the sad, and unnecessary, truth about most men who supposedly are “in 12-Step styled recovery.” They aren’t going to get over it. Indeed, they are continuously warned against even trying. Wives are warned against discussing it lest you interfere with him “working his program” and precipitate a relapse.

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